January 2020

Well Lovers, we made it! 2020! Perfect Vision, the year it's all gonna happen! This is our year!

If we only knew what was coming! I have to wonder if our worlds would have looked little differently the first couple months of the year if we had God's insight into the rest of it.  I feel like we would have been way more prepared in the education world! We went from one way of life one day and did 180 degree shift basically over night in how we operated, reached our kids, and kept the ball rolling as best we could.  I think if we could have prepared our families and students it would have looked differently, or at least some of the anxiety could have been lifted.  But we learned a lot, made it through as we do, and now we have a much better grasp on the whole as to how to handle situations like "The 'Rona".

SOO...January.....As I remember it was a very strange month.  It was filled with doctors appointments and uncertainty.   I met with my medical oncologist for the first time. **You won't believe this lovers, but my oncologist is actually a good friend I graduated high school with! Get chu an oncologist with an extra invested interest in you for sure!!**

It's a very humbling experience to walk into an oncologist office period but especially humbling to walk in as a patient, It's very overwhelming.   You are given alot of information.  Like ALOT of information.   We were in the room with my doctor for about an hour or more.  We know my diagnosis and stage but what we didn't know is where to proceed.  So my doctor laid out a few plans of action.   One plan you basically came in, the hooked you up with your chemo and you would wear a fanny pack for a week or two (I can't remember because I didn't choose that one) side effects traditionally were less because it was a slow release instead of a couple hour infusion.  The other option, the one I went with, was a combo of pills and a triweekly infusion.  This is what I went with in the end because it was less in and out of the doctors office and my friend even worked my schedule to make it even more minimal to come in. After this appointment we were told to go home process everything and she was going to present my case (evidently I was presented alot) to the board of doctors and we would reconvene in a few weeks to make a plan. There was a possibility I wouldn't need any sort of treatment.  That was a very bright spot, even a glimmer of hope to not have to go through chemo.

A few weeks pass, I continue life as normal, and we meet back with my doctor. As promised she met with the board and she told us basically no one would say I was crazy if I denied chemo since nothing had spread, and I was a stage 2A,  I then asked her, if she were in my position what would she do. She paused, thought not as a doctor but as my friend, and said "I would probably go ahead with treatment. If for no other reason but to give yourself the best shot of it not coming back."  I looked at my mom and for the first time I cried.   My mom simply hugged me, took my hand and said we will get through it.  With that the next few months would be devoted to staying healthy and simply getting though the chemo process.  The good news is because of my diagnosis I only had to do half of the usual 8 rounds.

About a week later, we had an education appointment where things continue to get real. In this appointment my sweet sweet nurse Tiffany went through everything chemo.  My mom was late to this appointment and God love if I wasn't crying when she walked in! Time two I broke down, what cha gonna do?!  We took in all the information mostly what to expect and every horrible side effect  that could and would happen. Chemo reacts differently to every person so they can't tell you exactly  what to expect but they can give you an idea based on what others have experienced,   The one thing I was told I could absolutely expect is cold sensitivity.  The particular chemo I was on affects your nerves causing you to become extremely sensitive to cold.  What they couldn't tell you is how sensitive you would become.  I had some major anxiety over starting this whole thing BUT what I did know in all the uncertainty is God was in the middle of everything, which gave me more peace than absolutely anything.

What I learned, along with how amazing God's promise to never leave you is, is to always take someone with you to major doctors appointments. As the patient you get overwhelmed very quickly. If you are like me at all, you hear key words and you basically just continue hearing those words over and over in your mind and it becomes hard to focus. So having someone else there gives you an extra set of eyes and ears to say "did you hear this?" "did they say that?". My mom was invaluable because we would decompress after appointments to make sure we heard the same, and her steadfast calm brought peace to me in a chaotic time. So if you are reading this thank you!! Also, get chu a momma like Bell Jackson!


Well, wasn't January a fun month? HAHA!

Until next time lovers!

XO!